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Fencing Sculptor's Diary

The Ramblings of a Reluctant Civil Servant

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Meh *Shrug*
Bonjour mes amis.

So it's Saturday Morning then.

Some how two days just completely vanished.

Thursday was spent with Mum and Dad, getting a laptop for my Mum who up to now has never really been allowed to use the PC my Dad bought afew years ago.

The experience was not a pleasant one with Dad kicking off over Microsoft Office. I would have been able to secure a copy for significantly less than the £70 PC World wanted, but he just went off on one shouting in the middle of the store and frankly winding Mum and I right up.

As he gets older he has a tendancy of behaving like a petulant 5 year old and seems not to care who's around to see it. All in all deeply upsetting but just the latest in aline of upsetting incidents.

Mum ended up with a lovely 17" screen 2 Gig Memory 120 gig HD Advent PC. We got home just after 1pm and it took most of the rest of the day on the phone to BT getting it connected to the Wireless network and then getting Norton antivirus and firewalls installed.

I ended up staying for dinner and left at about 20:30 hrs. Allin all a very tiring and stressfull day - still Mum is happy and online so objective achieved.

Friday was a bit of a non day, got up early and allowed myself the luxury of watching aCouple of Episodes of Fraiser and Will and Grace on TV before getting up and washed. The I went and got my hair cut.

I don't know if it actually qualifies as a new haircut, I are not fashionable in any way whatso ever, but apparently its sort of spikey pulled forward affair which is meant to be a little more hip than the side parting semi hippy I have sported for the last 36 years.

The style requires product apparently.

This worries me. First I'm a bloke - the rules say Ablutions consist of soap, a flannel, a tooth brush, toothpaste and ...NOTHING ELSE.

Second, apparently now I need a tub of Teatree Shaping Gum costing £12 for fecks sake....and it absolutely mustn't be Shock Waves or something else I forgot ...but VO5 might do.

Sorry did someone mistake me for Metrosexual Guy FFS ?

Since the hair cut has in my opinion failed to make me indistinguishable from Daniel Craig I suspect it will get the same treatment it has fro the last 36 years - a rub down with a towel and time/ cold weather permitting a bit of a going over with a hairdryer so I don't 'catch my death'.

After 'the haircut' I dropped my suit into the dry cleaners called in to see the aged parents as i was passing the door. Mum was out but it took about 2 minutes before Dad started spouting words of thoughtlessness... first off he was irritated ( said S*** we can't all be away at the same time) to discover that I am preparing to go to the States at the same time he and Mum are planning to go to Northumberland - and then segued into saying I was 'silly' for wanting to see the shuttle launch on the 8th as it was bound to be cancelled....

This was one push too far so I answered him back as politely as I could and pointing out that I couldn't exactly see why he bothered paying to see Cripple Palace play Football but that wasn't it great that differnt things floated differnt peoples boats .... I made my excuses and left. Honestly he could alienate me more if he tried.

I love my folks imeasurably but by God they wind me up - well Dad does.

I got home and watched a bit of telly, did a bit of sculpting, listened to bit of music, watched some more telly, fell asleep on the sofa , had dinner, did a bit more sculpting, finished a couple of Doctor Who vids, had a bottle of Spitfire and posted a tutorial I'd been promising to do on a website and went to bed at about 12:40 am.

So Friday was a bitty day.

Couldn't sleep so drifted off to the eccentric Soundtrack from Amelie......

I love that film and soundtrack and no matter how glum I feel Amelie can usually calm me down and make me smile.....

Sharon has one of those Gnomes you know.....

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My Dad sounds like you ? or sounds like your Dad ?

To be honest I don't think you are much like my Father, the little snippets of family life gleaned from your Journal show a very soft side to your nature, the fooling around with your daughter the self deprication.

I'm affraid these are things that my Dad finds very difficult. God bless himhe tries and I know he loves all of us - but he's not particularly well equipped to show it and when it does comes out, it does so as smothering and dictatorial and sometimes even hurtful.

Hence why I can't tell anyone in my family that I've joined the TA, or that he shows little interest in my art work to my face (but braggs about it out of my presence) and hence he's never seen me fencing, and never came to my sports fixtures when I was at school.

It's sad in a way as he misses out on so much, some of the importnat bits of life.

I don't know that I, or anyone else can help him with it either..

He sounds like me. I get irritated about things I don't need to, and it comes out in bursts of anger. Ridiculous. I get that from my mum. She can have it back, thanks.

My Dad never showed interest in my music, in fact everything I liked, as a boy, was a waste of time, and he even would go out of his way to say rotten things about them and me. I find myself doing the same thing to Karly, and I often have to button my lip rather than say something mean when she is just enjoying the harmless things she enjoys. He never came to a gig, (except when I played bass in a [gasp-o!] trad jazz band when I was 19), and now I avoid going to Karly's soccer games as I have always loathed sports so much, a big emotional scar from childhood.

Blimey, we're really getting to the nitty gritty here! If I do have that "soft side" as you say, it's because I want to be better to Karly than the bugger was to me. It's interesting that you say he missed out on the important bits of your life, as I don't want that to happen to me with Karly.

"It's interesting that you say he missed out on the important bits of your life, as I don't want that to happen to me with Karly."

and by being aware of that I am sure you won't.

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