November 28th, 2007


A bit Childish...

I am not the most confident person in the world and often have pretty low self esteem at the best of time, blessed as I am with an ego about the size of a shrivelled sultana !

It usually takes someone with something akin to a 'psychological claw hammer' to smack me around the head a bit before I will usually dispel these self-defeating thoughts.

If there's one thing guaranteed to strafe the old confidence and put my into a tailspin of ‘gloomy-bastardness’, it's being reminded of my significant ex. She remains the only person who I have ever truly been 'in luuuuurve' with, and despite idolising the poisonous vacuous harpyI and operating under the self delusion that she was every bit as attractive as Nicole Kidman, she binned me without even have the bollox to tell me why, for much more senior Officer in our Department, all-be-it a short, fat, slightly pink and bespectacled one. To add insult to injury he just happened to be my personnel officer. I can only assume that in a previous life I did something really bad and Karma decided to do me up the rear end in this life despite me being mostly harmless!

Not that I'm bitter of course I wish them nothing but happiness , my only wish really is that they pursue it the bowls of the fooking the sun stoked with the fire of hell itself.

Of course eleven years have passed now, and as you can tell, I'm pretty much over the whole sorry thing and doing really well.

I haven't set eyes on the 'female personification of evil' in a while know ... and if an eternity passes it will still be too soon. However, her boyfriend / fcukbuddy still works in this Department and frankly despite him probably being a perfectly nice bloke and, I'm sure, completely unworthy of my undiluted hatred, every time I see him think of him with my ex and wonder WHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY !?
Maybe has a great sense of Humour.

A while ago, maybe even as far back as last year, I saw him and grudgingly had to admit he was looking quite fit, he’d lost a lot of weight and he looked quite good. That was a while ago.

So you can imagine that evil Fencingsculptor was really quite pleased when returning from the first 40 minute run he done in ages because of my achillies tendonitis who should I bump into at the entrance barrier, but the competition looking for all the world like he'd accidentally scoffed the entire contents of not just the Pasty shop but the Bakers too.

The Ankles held up fine and my cardio fitness seems fine as I ran from Victoria down to Chelsea, around Battersea Park next to the Thames at low tide and back to Victoria

I'm sure I'm going to hell.
But at least as Old Nick’s trident wielding daemons are chasing us round Hell attempting to prod us in the arse, I'll be able to out-run that fat **** !

The Bear Necessities ...

40 lashes for called a Teddy Bear after a prophet what a load of old Bo-lox.

Maybe maybe they’d like some proper British Hard as Nails Teddies !

I believe there is one such Bear at Sandhurst wearing a Dennison Smock no less. Not sure why he isn’t wearing a purple /red beret but there you go……!

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So come on chaps….. It’s a name the bear Competition.

But remember 40 lashes to he (or she) that upsets the Fatwa Pixies TM !!


Mo Homme EdWard Bear

‘Grylls’ Bear (get it ?!)

Teddy “Flog the Infidel into Submission for Blaspheming the one true Allah” Bear

Allah Akbear

Feel free to chip in !