August 16th, 2006


Smile it's a beautiful day !

You don't have to check out geriatric1927 on to get your daily allowance hear grumbling, bitching griping and blogging.

No siree you can get that right here.

It's a good job it's not Monday. Because if I had been carrying my bag of swords when the 3rd person today stopped dead in front of me while talking bollocks into their mobile phone I would have been sorely tempted to run them through the throat with and Epee and leave them to expire gurgling in a pool of their own blood.

Harsh yes……but lets not dismiss it as a course of action against the oblivious generation who just get the frapping hell in my way.

Metro readers who walk along train platforms and through crowded tunnels are close behind the mobile users….

Call it commuter intolerance.

As if these heinous crimes weren't enough I saw something in a queue of traffic that actually made my jaw drop ….oh yes …ACTUAL JAW DROPPAGE people….

A cretinous female in her car, pulling up to the traffic lights , without holding the steering wheel while talking into a mobile phone and petting the most revolting ugly little pug dog on her lap ! (I'm assuming it was a pug dog an not some horrible growth and/or her boyfriend).

One can only hope that when such recklessly stupid and selfish behaviour does eventually lead to her and the ugly dogs untimely death in total road carnage that some other poor innocent sap isn't caught up in it.

Had there been a plod to hand I would definitely have pointed this out…but sadly the nearest one was just out of "Oi Plod look at that law breaker" distance…

Smile it's a beautiful day…..

How many Planets am I holding up ?

Well since the 30's it's been 9.

Now the Plutons have arrived....(there'll be a hip and trendy band called the Plutons by the end of the week you mark my words)....not sure whether this means that there are 8 planets and 4 plutons or whether pluto is still an honourary planet while the newbies are plutons....

I'm sure the spods will let us know.
So get your crayons out and chance your books...

1. Mercury
2. Venus
3. Earth
4. Mars
5. Jupiter
6. Saturn
7. Uranus
8. Neptune
9. Pluto a Pluton or a planet ?
10. Charon a Pluton
11. UB313 a Pluton
12. asteroid Ceres a Pluton

The Butterfly Effect

A post in a friends Live Journal reminded me of a funny Blackadder quote ("Security isn't a dirty word, Blackadder. Crevice is a dirty word, but security isn't."), which in turn led me to check it thar interwebby thing which led me to find this.

Which made me laugh;...

Captain Blackadder: I spy with my bored little eye something beginning with "T".
Private Baldrick: Breakfast.
Captain Blackadder: What??
Private Baldrick: My breakfast always begins with tea. Then I have a little sausage, then a egg with some little soldiers.
Captain Blackadder: Baldrick, when I said it begins with "T", I was talking about a letter.
Private Baldrick: Nah - it never begins with a letter. The postman dont come till 10.30.
Captain Blackadder: I can't go on with this. George, take over.
Lieutenant George: All right, sir. Umm... I spy with my little eye something beginning with "R"
Private Baldrick: Army.
Captain Blackadder: For God's sake, Baldrick. Army starts with an "A". He's looking for something that starts with an "R". Rrrrrrr.
Private Baldrick: Motorbike
Captain Blackadder: What?
Private Baldrick: Well, a motorbike starts with an rrrrm rrrrm rrrrm.
Captain Blackadder: Right, right, right. My turn again. What begins with "Come here" and ends in "Ow"?
Private Baldrick: I don't know.
Captain Blackadder: Come here.
Private Baldrick: [Blackadder punches Baldrick in the face] Ow!

Arggghhh the PC freaks are out again !

The Beeb has just run a story about an exam board has removed a cartoon "hangman's noose" from an online A-level results page following a complaint from an anti-suicide charity.

Now Terrance Lewis who used to be in my class at secondary school school used to scare the living bejesus out of me in class as he used to spend his time inventing twisted torture and rape machines that were really very very sick.

Not sure what happened to him. Last thing I heard was that he's become a chef.

Lets just say I wouldn't fancy any of the mince dishes from any restaurant he worked in

On the subject of doodles I found this exquisite piece on a google search for doodles (I was just making sure Terrance hadn't gone global you see)

Christine is constantly on at me to draw as well as sculpt …. When I start drawing I imagine something like the above…but it never works out that way….

Tales from the Work Bench and other Stuff....

Hey ho.

Well another rotten day at work - slowly getting my $h!t together but still far from being in the proper state of mind.

To be honest I think I need a break.

I haven't had a rest since, well I just can't remember - it's a simple as that.
I worked over Christmas.
Through out January Grandad was very ill and in and out of Hospital.

I used every spare minute from December through to February preparing for my trek to Everest base camp.

I spent February in Nepal.

On my return in March my Grandad passed away. Then there was the funeral and the internment of the Ashes in April.

I worked through Easter and all Summer so far, and the two days I had off in July I spent climbing ….with work colleagues.

My Jury Service was postponed from August to September….

I'm knackered on every level. I'm not training, I'm not working properly I'm not managing to jobs at home and neglecting my sculpting.

Socially I have been keeping busy , I have seen a lot of my french friend Christine, Antony and Sarah, but I haven't seen much of Sharon or Matthew and I have only just got round to sorting the Fencing BBQ.

In an attempt to turn things around a bit I rearranged my pre-op (wisdom teeth) Hospital appointment for October. I had the fence contractor visit tonight and revise his quote and commissioned him to do the work …

….and I took a long hard look at the Arwen sculpture that has been sitting on my desk for several yonks!

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The pictures are crap under artificial light but the key thing that needs to be done is to completely remodel the eyes. The corners of the mouth need work to. Then I need to go over the whole piece and try to restore the continuity of the features , to inject some life back into it , and stop it looking like the sculpture was done in the very disjointed manner in which it most certainly has done.